DON OAKES - MAD DOG & RAMEY
		The Air Force implemented a program called the 2T (2 tour) whereby any airman who agreed to serve back-to-back overseas duty assignments was promoted to Staff Sergeant. One such 2T'er was a guy nicknamed "Mad Dog." Mad Dog was a ditty bop. Sometimes he became so excited over matters that he would slobber and spit while talking, thus quickly earning the nickname. Mad Dog was a friendly and interesting person. He became emotionally attached to a 26-year-old Iraklion prostitute named Vickie. Vicki was petite, pretty and very flashy.
			Mad Dog was happy to spend all of his pay on Vicki, buying her anything she wanted. He even asked her to marry him but she refused, although the one thing she truly prized was an opportunity to live in America. That must have been embarrassing for him. Harris and I frequently visited Vicki at her place of business and every time we showed up Mad Dog was sitting on her sofa, alone, waiting for her to finish with her customers. Harris needled him mercilessly about it. On one such occasion, Harris, making fun of Mad Dog’s peculiar choice of masochism, got nose to nose with him and screeched. "I’m going to go back there and screw the eyeballs out of your girlfriend! Does that bother you, Mad Dog?" Forcing his babyish features into an inordinately fatuous smile, Mad Dog sputtered excitedly, a thin piping voice, "No… nooo. Not at all." He now was slobbering and spitting, his eyes popping out of his head. "She’s… she’s doing it only for the money. Love is not a factor here!" It was an interesting rationalization. He then gave Harris a frowny, somewhat sanctimonous, so-there look. "You dumb prick!
		There was a nice brothel in Iraklion run by a 25-year-old prostitute. She entertained her customers upstairs. When she finished with one, she stood at the top of the stairs and yelled down in broken English; "Come on up!" During one rainy winter night, 15 other airmen and myself were packed into the downstairs room, awaiting our turn to be summoned. Upstairs with the prostitute was an Able ditty bop by the name of Ramey. Ramey was a heavy boozer and this particular night he was dead drunk, too plastered to have sex but stubborn enough not to come downstairs until he did. This held up my turn. The prostitute became impatient. "Hurry up and finish," we heard her yell. "You’ve been here too long! Get off me! I’ve got other customers waiting." But Ramey held fast. He slurred petulantly, "I’m not going anywhere 'til I’m finished! I paid you … so shaddap! "Why you stupid drunk … you sonnabitch …. get off of me!" "Shaddap!" ________________
							Ramey with Goat